Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Monthly Musings: December, 2014

• The man and I have a hot date tonight, so I emptied my purse of extra ballast to travel light. The contents that I removed are as follows: a car charger, a pair of 3T undies, flushable wet wipes, an empty pill sorter, napkins from two different restaurants,  and a small plastic plate. #mombag

• A parenting hack that I read once said, 'when all else fails, put them in water.' I had no idea the same would hold true for getting a kid to poop in the potty. It never fails that 20 minutes into a bath, The Bud will jump up, demanding to go poop in the potty. This, from the kid who will do anything to avoid it any other time. It's working now, but I hope the habit doesn't hold over when he goes to college...

• W has always objected to his nom de plume on my blog. He thinks it's weird, and vaguely political. Typically, my position would be, 'get your own blog, buddy,' but I'm evolving as a person these days, so I listened to him. I never really cared for it either and it bugs me that he rarely reads anything I write, unless I make him. So, in an effort at diplomacy (and to get him to read my freaking blog, already!), I reached out to my buddies on Facebook for some nickname ideas, and got the following list: The Lion, Alice Cooper (taken), Pdaddy, The Artist formerly known as W, and Mr. BEAUjangles. You know. Because he's my beau. One reader even suggested that I go big and actually start calling him "Dubyah," but I have my pride, and frankly don't want it getting around that I'm sleeping with George W. Bush. Gossips, man...

As you can tell, I had a lot of fun with all this. :)

So it is with great fanfare that I now present to you, The Artist Formerly Known as W, or The Artist, for short. Yippee!

• That said, The Artist is getting on my nerves. I love Christmas. I love the wonder and mystery of the anticipation of Jesus' birth. I love dressing up, getting together with family and friends, and eating yummy food. I also love giving presents, but this year, he's cramping my style. All year, this man has been laying down all KINDS of hints for the perfect gifts and stocking stuffers, and I've been feverishly taking notes, cackling with glee in anticipation of his joy when he opens them. Then, when it came time to start shopping for said gifts, what does he do? He buys them himself! Everything, and I mean everything I had planned to get him, he bought for himself in the month of December. I give up. Watching him unravel my holiday planning is turning this cheerful giver into The Grinch, real quick. If he's not careful, all he'll have to open on Christmas morning is some socks and underwear. Oh, wait! Noooo...He already bought those. Grr...#hesgettingalumpofcoal

From my family to yours, Merry Christmas and a happy, healthy, and prosperous New Year!

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