Friday, January 29, 2016

Daddy's Birthday Blues

The pilot died at 4 am.
Who's qualified to fix it?
Daddy's birthday blues.
Pancakes on the menu, again.
Somebody's gotta mix it.
Daddy's birthday blues.

Changing itty girl clothes with giant hands,
Potty training woes and Mama's demands,
These things can weigh pretty heavy on a man.
Daddy's birthday blues.

Long day on the grind, got a beer in mind,
Daddy's birthday blues.
Man, I've been beat up,
Can't wait to put my feet up.
Daddy's birthday blues.

Just settling down,
To smooth out that frown, 
When a tiny voice pipes from the calm,
T-Rex can't battle alone, his little boy moans.
Daddy's birthday blues.

Some time with his girl would do him just fine.
Daddy's birthday blues.
Uncork that wine, babe, it's just after 9.
Daddy's birthday blues.

The candles are lit
Strains of music fill the air
When baby's cry cuts through the bliss.
Hold off on that dance,
Teething killed the romance.
Daddy's birthday blues.

It don't seem this way,
In our busy day-to-day,
When the thanks seem as thin as your patience.
But I see what you do
And I thank God for you
Life with you is the only thing that makes sense.

You get better every year and I love being part of the journey. Here's to another year of adventure. Happy birthday, sweet man! XOXO

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

The Secret of My Success Is Low Expectations

A brief list of my accomplishments from the last 24 hrs:

-I made the call to a friend I've been meaning to invite to dinner for weeks.

-I went to the gym today (5:30 am, y'all) for the first time since October.

-I made eye contact with and said "I love you' to each member of my family before I left the house this morning.

-I packed a lunch.

-I stopped on my way home from work last night to buy new windshield wiper blades to replace the 2 yr old mud-rubbers I'd had on there. I even installed them.

BOOM. Good job, Me.

Sunday, January 24, 2016

Monthly Musings: A Year In Review--2015

Boy, have I missed you guys! 2015 was inSANE. With the new baby, the move, and the new job, most days, I didn't (and still don't) know whether I'm coming or going, but my choices are either to write or not to write, so I choose the former. Even with the 4 year old sitting next to me, begging for iPhone access and another piece of chocolate, "pwease, Mommy." I will write and I will like it. Maybe not as much as I like this chocolate, but whatever. This little post is a combo of musings from December to get my feet wet and a state of family affairs to get you back up to speed on the goings on around here. Sit tight and enjoy. You can have some chocolate when you're done reading the entire post.

• After a month of an unceasing litany of Christmas tunes on the radio, I was disappointed not to have heard every parent's classic favorite: All I Want for Christmas Is An Uninterrupted Nap.

• Relegated to the hottest, itchiest corner of Hell, be the creators of all tiny toys and toys with small component parts--marbles, Legos, pick up sticks, jacks, dinosaurs, soldiers--you name it. Oh, and whoever created toys that require AAA batteries. We never have AAA batteries, so them, too. Straight to Hell.

• Having a baby in the house is like living with a rooster. #getityet?

• I'm up at or before dawn most days, whether I like it or not (note: I do not.), but somehow never manage to be on time for anything. #dichotomy

• My 4 year old mispronounced the word "bloodier," instead saying, "blooder." Do I correct him, or pretend the ghoulish conversation never happened?

The Baby:
is 8 months old and wonderful. She's the smiliest little bit of lovin' you ever did see. We kiss and snuggle her constantly. She's got one tooth and crazy, curly hair, sits up almost completely unassisted, snorts down solid food like a Depression survivor, and has been pushing up to her knees and rocking for about 3 weeks now. Crawling is imminent. #slowdownlittlelady

The House:
is little and cute and perfect for us. We love our new digs. Everybody has his/her own space to fill up with too much stuff and yet we all still manage to spend most of our time in the kitchen. As much as I hate(d) moving, this was a good idea and I'm excited to make memories here. If you're in our neck of the woods, come by and see us. We love visitors! #littlehouseintheburbs

The Bud:
is starting kindergarten in the Fall. My baby. They're taking 3 month olds in kindergarten now, apparently. Also, if it's possible to die of impotent rage, he's killing us, slowly and painfully. As I mentioned, he's sitting next to me, currently getting peanut residue backwash in my water glass, chirping about what a "healthy and awesome" drink water is. My water, not his. His water in his own cup, he hates with a blazing fire. Mama's is the only water worthy of his backwash. I swear there is a conspiracy afoot (perpetuated by other parents who have already fallen for it and want you to suffer, too) to make parents keep children past their expiration dates. Every year of his life, some seasoned parent has earnestly assured me that next year, things will get sooo much better. That if I just hang in there, this year I will get to enjoy the spoils of the war we've waged since he developed a will of his own.

They are dirty liars. They only say that to dupe us into keeping him another year.

Without hyperbole, I can say that he's more frustrating, irritating, willful, tantrumy, whiny, and disobedient at 4 years old than he's ever been. And we couldn't love him more. In spite of it all, we are completely devoted to him, snuggling and kissing him whenever he'll allow it. #chumps

The Job:
is in Sales, for those of you who don't know. Every day is new, and challenging, and exciting. I feel like an idiot most of the time, but I'm grateful for the chance and determined to succeed.

The Baby Weight:
has gone nowhere. I am pissed. And hungry. #dammit

The Artist:
is still a complete hottie, and as it turns out, is quite handy at home repairs. If I could only get him to use one paper towel at a time instead of 4, I'd have it all.

That's all I got for right now. Here's hoping that 2016 works out to be The Year of Us All. We deserve it.

From me, to you. XOXO